Saturday, March 29, 2014

April Underwater

March came in like a lion and went out like a kick in the balls. If I see another snowflake I am going to start babbling incoherently. Who knows? Perhaps I already am. Today it has been raw and pouring like a great monsoon. As I type this I can hear chilly sheets of rain pattering on our window.

Her Majesty and I have both been sick. Moans, sighs and whispers have been replaced with coughs, hacks and sneezes. When Her Majesty is sick I am kept very busy though I feel more like a nurse than a sub. When we are both sick it’s just holy hell.

As regular readers of the blog may remember I usually go diving around this time of year. I will soon be sailing over distant tropical seas bound for destinations with no Internet or cell phone service. I will explore pristine coral reefs, watch grey reef sharks feed on a chumsickle and wild pigs swim.

Her Majesty will not be coming on this trip and has given me permission to go alone. She understands that I need to do this every once in awhile and has given me her blessing to go have an adventure. She knows this is good for my soul. Another one of the many reasons I love her so.

The World Underwater by Xthumbtakx
Underwater World by Yuliaannaalexz
Underwater Ocean Floor Light by Della Stock
Underwater Light and Bubbles by Della Stock
Underwater by Andenne
All images courtesy of

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Finding The Holy Grail

In a recent post titled “Fantasy Vs. Reality” a submissive male client asked; “will this remain a fantasy in my head or is it possible to realize my fantasies in real life?” Translation: “Is it possible to go beyond the occasional pro session and experience submission in the context of a committed relationship?”

Many people have unrealistic expectations about D/s relationships. If we seek the equivalent of a 24/7 pro session we will probably be disappointed. On the other hand clients sometimes refer to the search for lifestyle female dominants as “searching for unicorns” or “trying to find the holy grail”. Personally I don’t think the situation is that dire.

A more realistic question might be whether its possible to pursue a lifestyle D/s relationship with someone we love, integrating our submissive desires with the rest our lives and balancing the two in a healthy non destructive way. That narrows the goal down considerably but it will require hard work and commitment on our part to achieve. It may also require letting go of some preconceived notions. Will we be disappointed if reality doesn't quite duplicate our fantasies?

Kinky self awareness often starts as a confusing jumble of thoughts and emotions. Do we sincerely desire to serve or is “serving” code for acting out our fantasies? Rather than envisioning a lifetime of servitude it might be better to start with baby steps.  Her Majesty and I started with kinky play in the bedroom. I confessed my fantasies and she was willing to explore them. For marriage minded subs it is extremely important to “pop the question” before tying the knot. I made a lot of mistakes but that is one thing I believe I got right.

Many subs are reluctant to confess their fantasies because they fear being rejected. If your partner loves you and enjoys turning you on there is a good chance she will meet you halfway. Writings by female dominants strongly suggest they enjoy watching the reactions of their play partner(s). With any luck your lady will get turned on watching you get turned on. She may even share some fantasies of her own with you.

Service eventually became part of our relationship. That helped perpetuate the D/s connection in between sessions. Her Majesty is naturally dominant (she would say “bossy”) so she enjoys having me at her beck and call. I learned to actively seek out opportunities to serve; anticipating her wishes before she asked. I still only get that right about half the time. She requires that I treat her with the utmost respect and for the most part I defer to her wishes. We both like it this way.

It is sometimes difficult to give the proper advice to others because every person and every relationship is unique. The path Her Majesty and I chose would not work for everyone. Our relationship has been influenced by a host of factors unique to our lives that determined the choices we made along the way. Some of those choices were shaped by outside circumstances over which we had little or no control. But regardless of what life threw at us we made our relationship a priority and stuck it out through the tough times. If I could point to any one factor as being the “secret of our success” it would be that.

If you are not in a kinky relationship you may find the dating pool is smaller than you would like. Don’t despair. In the Internet age it has become much easier to meet like minded people. There are support groups, munches and play parties to explore. Don’t dismiss the vanilla dating pool either. It is unlikely a dominant woman will appear out of nowhere to sweep you off your feet . If you want to find that special someone you will have to put yourself out there. I recommend reading Ms. Pearl’s post: “33 Things Every Submissive Man Should Know”. There is a lot of truth and helpful advice to be found therein.

Achieving happiness in a D/s relationship requires our active and continuing involvement. We will only find what we are looking for by making a concerted effort. Every moment won’t be a perfect fantasy. But if this is something we deeply desire it will all be worthwhile. Above all don’t get discouraged. There is hope! In closing, as Aarkey would say; “Namaste!”

Artwork by:

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Steamy Femdom Meditations

As followers of her blog already know, the writings of Ferns are highly erotically charged. Each chapter of “Domme Chronicles” reads like a short steamy meditation on female domination.

Ferns has a gift for perverting vanilla. Simple acts like kissing, touching, bathing or being undressed become deeply kinky explorations. BDSM activities are usually kept simple, a belt, a blindfold, a length of rope and thou. Ferns is primarily interested in the mental, physical and emotional reactions of her playmates. This is female domination with minimal props required.

That is not to say all of the play described in “Domme Chronicles” is of the light sensual variety. In “First Time” Ferns whips an arrogant boy until he is transformed into a “begging, wanting, beautifully vulnerable thing”. She is transformed by his transformation and the experience is something of a revelation. By the end she reaches the conclusion; “I have to get me some more of that!”

Ferns delights in the sweet spot between tenderness and cruelty. Many of the meditations in “Domme Chronicles” are sensual, wistful and romantic with just enough control applied by the female dominant to push the action into the realm of SM. She delights in the the subtle nuances of seduction and the reactions of her play partners which she often describes as igniting her hunger. Speaking of hunger, Ferns is very oral. Kissing is a frequent recurring theme in “Domme Chronicles”. Be warned though. She also likes to bite!

In “Domme Chronicles” the woman is always in charge, always in control and always on top. Ferns likes her men “sweet, grateful, vulnerable” and “expectant.” They are her playthings to do with as she pleases. She never allows them to get too comfortable. They have to earn the privilege of serving and suffering for her.

Ferns enjoys putting her subjects in predicaments, keeping them in suspense and making them wait. “It amuses me to make you wait” she writes in “Good Morning”. “I can feel your impatience crackling between us.” In “Putting Him To Bed” she delights in the thought of her sub tied to the bed thinking of her and unable to sleep. In “Card Game” the destiny of a sub depends on what card he draws from the deck. Will chance dictate a fate he desires or fears? She likes to keep her subs and her readers guessing.

If you are (like me) a submissive man curious to understand the female dominant perspective “Domme Chronicles” is a book you will enjoy reading. It may also prove an excellent gift for that special lady you want to turn onto D/s. This is BDSM taken from a feminine and extremely sensual point of view. Some of these vignettes seem right out of a romance novel. Except the roles are reversed. The woman is the seducer. The man is her target. Exactly as it should be.

Images by:
Yumine Guo

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Her Wish Is Your Command

I first became aware of D.L. King when I discovered her short story “Pick A Color” in a collection of femdom erotica titled “Please Ma’am”, edited by Rachel Kramer Bussel. In “Pick a Color” a submissive male foot fetishist applies for a job in a lady’s nail salon much to the amusement of the all female staff. The salon owner pairs him with a difficult customer who helps him realize the depths of his submissive nature when she invites him to her home for follow up pedicure appointments . In the collection “Yes Ma’am” I stumbled on an equally intriguing story titled “A Different Kind of Reality Show” in which a man signs up to provide stimulating entertainment for a bevy of anonymous ladies via webcam. Both stories enthralled me. I soon ended up purchasing D.L. King’s novels “The Melinoe Project” and “The Art of Melinoe” and reviewing them here.

I was very pleased when Diane posted that a collection of her short stories had recently been published by Riverdale Avenue Books under the title “Her Wish Is Your Command”. I found some familiar favorites in this collection but also many stories I had never read before. Some new discoveries include Eve and Cute Boy; two characters that come to life on the page with authentic and explosive erotic energy. In “Let’s Dance” Eve seduces Cute Boy in a bar and brings him home to her well appointed loft in Brooklyn where she introduces him to the joys of bondage and submission. In “Cute Boy Gets Squeezed” the experimentation continues when Eve introduces Cute Boy to her roommate Nigel (a photographer specializing in kinky erotica) imprisons him in a vacbed and plies him with electrical stimulation.

 In “Mr. Smith, Ms. Jones Will See You Now” a loving wife gives her husband an appointment with a professional dominatrix as a birthday present. At the age of 55 he belatedly discovers the joy of submitting to a dominant woman proving you are never too old to live out your dreams. In “The Tao Of Lust” Mistress Carmen dominates 4 slaves via webcam, directing 4 orgasms simultaneously before seeing to her own. This story would be “too much” for most publishers D.L.King informs us in the introduction. Thank goodness then for Lori Perkins at Riverdale Avenue Books!

Why do I like D. L. King so much? Because she is the real deal; a female dominant with a ton of real world experience who writes astonishingly well. There is nothing forced or unnatural about her erotica. Her characters live and breathe on the page with dialogue that is snappy, evocative and often humorous. No matter how imaginative the fictional backdrops in her stories, the protagonists always comes across as genuine. D.L.King's love for femdom erotica is evident throughout this collection and she communicates that heat directly to the reader, combining personal experience and a fertile imagination to produce a collection of irresistible femdom short stories.

To my subbie brethren; if you have ever wanted to get inside the mind of a dominant woman and experience D/s from the other side of the whip reading “Her Wish Is Your Command” is an excellent place to start. As you read these stories you will discover that D.L. King is well acquainted with the submissive male mind and knows exactly what makes you tick.

Illustrations by the mighty Sardax!

Sunday, February 23, 2014

There Be Dragon Canes!

Saturday night Her Majesty and I finally had a chance to try out two lovely new Dragon Canes I purchased from Quality Control. On Sunday the inside of my butt cheeks are still sore from one of the longest canings I have ever received. I had previously ordered a Singapore prison cane and a reformatory cane from Quality Control. The prison cane was more like a club. Readers of the blog will recall that Her Majesty refused to use it on me. This time I went in the other direction choosing two thinner more delicate canes; the junior and senior models respectively. Dragon Canes are made in Singapore of the highest quality rattan and treated to remain strong and supple. I ordered ours with elegant black lambskin handles.

Her Majesty sat on the couch; regal and imperious. I knelt on the floor beneath her passionately worshiping her feet. In the mood for something stronger I asked if it might be OK for me to go fetch some toys. When she said yes I brought down the canes and her custom made dominatrix boots. Knee high and made of supple black leather with 3 inch stiletto heels and gold eyelets her special boots lace all the way up the front. They remind me of footwear depicted in classic fetish photographs by Irving Klaw from the 1960s.

Her Majesty laughed when she saw me coming downstairs with my armful of goodies. I put the boots on for her slowly and lovingly; slipping them onto her feet and savoring the task of lacing them up. Then I stripped naked and knelt beneath her on the floor. She reached between my legs and tenderly squeezed my balls making me groan and putting me in the proper head space. Then she proceeded to cane me slowly and sensually. I groveled on the floor beneath her kissing and licking her black leather boots thanking her for every cut. She did not rush. She took frequent breaks to run her hand gently over my fevered bottom. My caning went on for a very long time. Finally she pulled her booted foot away and began caning me more vigorously. Building to a slow crescendo she made me whimper, moan and cry out before she was done.

When my punishment was finally over I draped myself over her leg. She laughed extending her booted foot for me. Unable to resist I humped Her Majesty’s black leather boot like a little dog while she tenderly played with my hair. The feeling of soft supple leather sliding against my cock was delicious despite the roughness of the laces and the metal eyelets gouging into my flesh. My orgasm exploded, splashing all over the laces of her beautiful black leather boots. I lay with my head in her lap for a few minutes as I drifted slowly back down to earth. Finally I asked her how she liked her new Dragon Canes.

“I used the little one. It’s slender, petite and elegant. Just my style. I love my new toy!”

The moral of this story? Always purchase toys your partner enjoys playing with. You’ll be glad you did!

Images Courtesy of:

Saturday, February 22, 2014

I'm Back!

My apologies for falling off the grid temporarily. I had to deal with a little security SNAFU. It was partly a  "duh" moment on my part, partly an indication of how difficult it is becoming to maintain anonymity on the Internet.  I feel like I was attacked by an invisible cyber squid with green kryptonite tentacles! Down squid down!

Anyway gosh that was stressful! I was going to put up a sexy new post but fear I have been overcome by the vapors. Stay tuned for the next exciting and suspenseful episode...

Thursday, February 13, 2014

Longevity In D/s Relationships

My friend and fellow blogger Dymion recently pointed out the lack of information available on achieving longevity in D/s relationships. There is plenty out there on ways to find a partner but precious little advice on how to make a relationship last.

Every person and every relationship is unique. D/s relationships are by definition more complicated than vanilla relationships. What has worked for Her Majesty and I over the past 27 years would not work for everyone.

That said, I believe D/s can help keep the romance in a relationship fresh, exciting and vibrant. The key is making sure your relationship is based on a firm foundation of love and trust. What follows are a few suggestions based on personal experience:

1) Establish compatibility before tying the knot. Establishing kink compatibility is not a guarantee for future success but it should be considered a necessary condition for achieving it. Your partner does not have to like all of the same things you like but she should be open minded about kink, accept you for who you are and be willing to explore.

2) Practice open and honest communication. Your relationship will not reach its full potential without honest communication nor can you hope to solve the problems that will inevitably come up if you can’t talk about them honestly.

3) Nobody has it all. We rarely possess everything we desire in life or balance everything in our lives successfully. Try to be realistic and honest with yourself about what you can reasonably expect from a D/s relationship.

4) “No fault assurance.” The blame game is self defeating. When you point the finger at your partner you should see two fingers pointing back at yourself. You are in this thing together. Never let petty resentments or a festering grudge divide you.

5) Every minute can’t be play time. If you think it through you will realize this fantasy is not only impossible but probably not even desirable. In any case it won’t happen so best to know that up front.

6) Practice flexibility in D/s roles. Sometimes it doesn’t work to filter everything through a predefined set of protocols. Even if she is naturally dominant there will be times when your lady needs you to take charge. She may need a strong protective arm around her or a shoulder to cry on. There may be times when your ideas are beneficial to the relationship and should be heard regardless of who is dominant or submissive. Wear your D/s role like a loose garment rather than an impenetrable suit of armor.

7) Accept downtime and appreciate the little things. There will be times when unforeseen circumstances will mean taking a break from D/s activities for a period of time. The key to survival is acceptance. During times of inactivity take comfort in the little things that reinforce your D/s romance; a tender foot massage or a furtive kiss on her booted toe.

8) Practice flexibility In Play. Be open to trying new things and changing your routine. Play style is bound to evolve over time. Be open to change and go with what works not just for you but for your partner.

9) Many subs lack a dominant woman in their lives to serve and play with who loves them for who they are. If you are one of the fortunate few never forget to count your blessings and show your lady how much she means to you both in word and in deed. A little gratitude goes a long way.

As always your mileage may vary so take what you need and leave the rest. I wish everyone who reads “Her Majesty’s Plaything” a very Happy Valentines Day! :-)

 Images courtesy of: