Thursday, May 28, 2015

HMP Signing Off

It's been coming for awhile. I just had separation anxiety about stepping away from this blog. This is going to be my last post for the foreseeable future. To be honest I kept blogging a lot longer than I thought I would. I feel the need to step away now. Her Majesty and I will be traveling out of the country soon so we will be dropping off the grid entirely. I am really looking forward to that. I definitely need to unplug for awhile.

I don't want to continue writing about the intimate details of my marriage. I still love playing with Her Majesty. I just don't want to blog about it anymore. There are countless “stories” on Her Majesty’s Plaything already. Some of the best bits were extracted, reconstituted in short story form and appear in the collection “Under Her Thumb: Erotic Stories of Female Domination”, edited by D.L. King. It is possible I may return at some future date to post more femdom fiction. I haven't decided about that yet.

I am glad folks enjoyed reading about our sessions as much as I enjoyed writing about them. I just received an email from someone saying they loved my “stories”. I can't write fiction this authentic. At least not yet. Everything described on Her Majesty’s Plaything is true with the exception of posts specifically identified as fiction.

The view the blog provides of our relationship is one sided. Nobody has heard from Her Majesty with the exception of a comment at my 20 year sober anniversary and a quote in which she said the secret of being a Domme was “not being afraid to be bossy”. Some folks took exception to that for being too simplistic. It makes me laugh to think of it now. I thought it was adorable. She really means it too. She is extremely bossy! Unfortunately Her Majesty has never taken an interest in the blog. She does not share my enthusiasm but she has been extremely patient with me.

The blog has been entirely focused on our D/s relationship. I left out terabytes worth of day to day stuff that happens in our lives. There are also things about our relationship that I haven't shared because I didn't think they were suitable for public consumption. I long ago resolved not to air our dirty laundry in public out of respect for Her Majesty. We do not have a perfect relationship. Nobody does. If anything D/s roles just make things more complicated.

After all the writing and thinking I have done on this topic I wish I could say I know the answers to the myriad questions surrounding how best to have a successful femdom relationship. I feel like the more I learn the less I know. It is very difficult to stay in D/s roles permanently or even most of the time. D/s is largely based on fantasy. That fantasy often has to be paused, sometimes for a long time, while we deal with urgent life matters that are not romantic, glamorous or sexy. Success or failure depends on how quickly we rebound and how flexible we can be.

It helps not to blame ourselves or each other for things that happen which are beyond our control. It helps to cherish our time together and be good to each other. It helps to forgive each other for not being perfect and for the mistakes we will inevitably make because we are only human.

This is HMP signing off. Thanks for reading Her Majesty’s Plaything!

Images courtesy of :
Submissive Guy Comics
Charles M. Shulz

Friday, May 22, 2015

Sardax On The Web

It’s Friday afternoon and the beginning of the Memorial Day weekend. I am out of work early on a beautiful spring day. I should probably start posting on Fridays instead of Saturdays. On Friday night Her Majesty goes out drinking with the girls and leaves me home alone. Perhaps one night she will come home tipsy and smack me around a little?

Following up on a post by Paltego at Femdom Resource I would like to say how excited I am that the great femdom artist Sardax has created his own blog.  Sardax has been posting regular updates with accompanying artwork including commissioned portraits of well known Dominas, art inspired by The Other World Kingdom,  a whimsical interpretation of Alice In Wonderland, The Sardax Circus and The Gag Shopan intriguing series of paintings inspired by Japanese femdom artist Anmo Night. Sardax includes discussions of the history and inspiration behind each work of art in every post.

In what should be required reading for every aspiring femdom artist, Sardax provides a fascinating window into his artistic technique and creative process. His blog includes discussions on life drawing, painting a watercolor and even step by step instructions for drawing a high heeled shoe. I confess I attempted the last exercise and fear I will never become the next Underling or RedRump

I have posted a link to the artist's blog in my Kindred Spirits section so readers will be notified when Sardax posts new content. Sardax is also on Twitter so you can keep up with ongoing updates about his world and even join in the conversation.

Sardax was my inspiration for moving away from a text only version of this blog to one that included visual imagery. For a long time his art was the only imagery adorning my posts. I love his work not just for its technical excellence but because it captures the feeling, spirit and essence of femdom. At least it does for me. Anyway stop reading my blog and go read his! I wish everyone a safe and joyous Memorial Day weekend!

Mistress portraits by Sardax in order of appearance:
Mistress Sheri Darling
Mistress Ezada
Mistress Lucy Khan
Mistress Darcy
Mistress Sidonia
Mistress Akella

Saturday, May 9, 2015

Submissive Evolution

This morning I took Her Majesty out to breakfast then shopping for Mother's Day. This weekend she will be served and pampered like the Queen she is. I will do all the housework cooking and other chores while she relaxes and enjoys some much needed leisure time.  That makes this weekend like pretty much every other weekend in our Femdom household.

As much as I love classic BDSM Her Majesty and I have mostly evolved toward a kinder gentler version of that. Play time is an occasional treat but it doesn't represent our day to day reality. In the beginning our D/s relationship revolved entirely around isolated sessions in the bedroom. As wonderful as those sessions were I couldn't help feeling like something was missing. That something was continuity. Over time our D/s relationship has expanded to include a lot of Goddess worship, tender touching and devoted service to fill in the gaps.

Service is the fuel for our D/s relationship. That is especially true when I serve Her Majesty with no thought of reward for myself. I have discovered that when I serve her out of love with no expectations or strings attached my devotion comes back to me ten fold. She spontaneously responds by doing things I enjoy not because I ask her to but because I am making her happy and she wants to give that energy back to me.

As a husband opportunities abound for me to serve Her Majesty, reduce her stress, make her life easier and more comfortable. Increasingly I am taking on all of the cooking and the cleaning while she relaxes after a hard day’s work. Her Majesty is a far better cook than I am but my culinary skills have improved somewhat by all reports. When it comes to household chores the more I take on the more she likes it. Now I am often busier at home than I am at work.

My favorite act of service is giving Her Majesty a long relaxing foot massage at the end of a stressful day. I am told that I have improved greatly but I am searching for foot massage classes in my area and recently purchased some books on reflexology so I can take my skills to the next level.

There will always be room for growth, improvement and self discovery. My journey into submission has been very beautiful and it isn't over yet. I am still unlocking the mysteries of my submissive heart.

I would like to wish everyone who reads Her Majesty's Plaything a very Happy Mother's Day!

Photos Courtesy of:
At Her Feet
FemDom Marriage
FemDom Archive

Saturday, May 2, 2015

A Submissive's Guide To Meeting A Mistress

I was fascinated to read Goddess Cheyenne’s new book “Yes Ma’am: A Submissive’s Guide To Meeting A Mistress”. Cheyenne is a well known professional dominatrix who is concerned that ne'er do wells posing as legitimate prodommes are exposing submissive clients to disappointment and even physical danger. Helping subs navigate the morass of marketing material on the Internet is only a part of the book’s purpose. “Yes Ma’am” is intended for newbie subs seeking to connect with a Mistress for the first time. Cheyenne touches on searching for a Mistress in the lifestyle scene as well as the pro scene. She advises aspiring slaves to; “stand out from the crowd with a first impression worth remembering” and reminds us that “proper behavior is paramount.”

Some of the points made in “Yes Ma’am” will be familiar to experienced submissives. (Do we really think it is proper etiquette to send penis pictures to prospective dominants?) Cheyenne makes it clear that she is speaking to neophytes who have not yet made peace with their own proclivities. She takes an interest in a sub’s mental and emotional state as evidenced by the simple meditation exercises discussed in the beginning of the book. I found it refreshing to read a book written by a professional dominant who seems to genuinely like submissive men. I realize we can be incredibly annoying sometimes.

Cheyenne stresses the importance of self acceptance and embracing our kink. She coaches subs to acknowledge the difference between fantasy and reality and maintain realistic expectations concerning D/s relationships. She advises us to be mentally prepared to surrender into submission and give serious thought to our interests and boundaries before doing so. Cheyenne encourages us to develop a “skill set of servitude” and a knowledge of basic submissive protocol before we begin our search for a Mistress.

Above all Goddess Cheyenne hopes her book will help submissives “learn to recognize fact from fiction in professional Femdom advertising as well as on blogs and boards in the community.” She warns aspiring subs to check facts carefully before making initial contact. She advises us to remain cognizant of truth in advertising as scams have become increasingly common in the Internet age. Here the book breaks new ground as Cheyenne takes us through the best methods for fact checking the websites of professional dominants. Even veteran scene players will find some valuable insights here.

“Yes Ma’am” is short sweet and to the point. Usually a slow reader, I easily finished the book in an afternoon. Cheyenne has set the price point very low so it can reach the maximum possible audience. “Yes Ma’am” is obviously a labor of love for her and a gift to the BDSM community.

 I enjoyed reading "Yes Ma'am" and found myself wanting to hear more from Goddess Cheyenne. If you are considering seeing a professional dominatrix for the first time I highly recommend purchasing a copy. “Yes Ma’am” is currently available in Kindle format from Amazon, Barnes and Noble and from Cheyenne’s website.

Photos Courtesy of:
Opulent Fetish

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Her Majesty's Whip

Her Majesty sat regally on the couch. I knelt on the carpet beneath her. She wore open toed stiletto mules that displayed her perfect arches to advantage. Pressing her foot to my lips she offered me her toes to suck. I did so greedily as she started to warm me up with little flicks of her short single tail whip. She built my whipping slowly while I knelt beneath her on the floor eagerly worshipping her feet. She took her time painting my ass fire engine red. I moaned, whimpered and thanked her as the cruel little whip rose and fell. I was so grateful for her attentions. I live for this.

I moaned as I felt the palm of her hand gently cool my fevered flesh. Sometimes a tender touch is more devastating than a savage blow. She placed her hand gently on my lower back and started cutting me with short controlled strokes. Surrendering to her completely I moved slightly forward giving her more room to swing. She painted stripes across my upper thighs making me cry out. Each lash brought me closer to that blissful place I can never visit often enough. Her Majesty built my whipping slowly toward its inevitable climax. When it was over she removed her shoes and used my face as her settee. I lay on the floor beneath her, kissing and smelling her feet while the endorphins coursed through my body.

“What’s this big thing?” she asked picking up the black dildo. Our new toy is longer and thicker than its predecessor. It is made of black silicone and fits as though it were custom designed for my body. It has no head and is perfectly smooth. It’s gentle curving arch touches me in all the right places.

Her Majesty pressed the big black cock against my asshole. I helped her guide it in, pushing up against it and impaling myself. It felt huge and impossibly pleasurable sliding into me and stretching me out. I moaned deliriously, frantically answering her slow, delicious strokes. She reached down and squeezed my balls as she drove the dildo all the way in sending an exquisite shock of pleasure shooting through my nervous system up to my brain. I cried out and erupted as my beloved Queen tenderly milked the cum from my balls.

Afterwards, I lay beneath her on the floor kissing the bottoms of her feet and savoring her familiar delicious smell. I barely left her side for rest of the night not wanting to be away from the comforting fire of her warmth for very long. Her Majesty is my other half. Together we are a perfect fit.

Images Courtesy of:
Leather Femdom

Saturday, April 4, 2015

Wired Like A Dog

They say all men are dogs and I’m no exception. I love cats but I’m wired like a dog.

I tend to be extremely loyal, frisky and playful.

I am sometimes overly enthusiastic and wag my tail vigorously at inappropriate times.

I love the feeling of being owned and spending quality time curled up at Her Majesty’s feet.

I am apt to be very friendly unless you really piss me off. Then I will probably growl at you.

One of my online handles was a canine derivative and a friend of mine still calls me “doggie” to this day.

I have never officially tried “puppy play” but I was beaten with a newspaper once.

When I receive welcome attention from Her Majesty I think of it as having my “belly rubbed”.

The leash Her Majesty keeps around my neck is strictly metaphorical but every time she throws a stick or a frisbee I run and go fetch it.

My olfactory senses are a huge erogenous zone for me as this exchange between Her Majesty and I clearly demonstrates:

Me: “Would you like me to help you off with your boots Ma’am?”

HM: “Sure! Come over here!”

(I kneel at Her Majesty’s feet and remove her black ankle boots)

HM: “Take off my socks too please.”

Me: “Yes Ma’am. May I please kiss your feet?”

HM: “You just want to SMELL my feet!” (laughing)

Me: “You know me too well Ma’am! You know me like the back of your hand!”

And she does too…

Like most dogs I am an enthusiastic sniffer and licker. Everything about the way Her Majesty smells and tastes is beautiful to me. I love smelling the crook of her neck. Also other more intimate places. Her smell always reminds me of home. Of course all dogs like the traditional doggie greeting and I’m no different. Fortunately Her Majesty regularly allows me this deliciously fragrant all consuming form of worship. I am such a lucky dog!

So if you see me on the street there is no need to call my name. You can just whistle...

Images courtesy of:
Submissive Guy Comics
Bei Fuss
Lux Slave

Saturday, March 21, 2015

Female Domination

To this day controversy surrounds the book “Female Domination” by Elise Sutton. Is she really a dominant woman or is she actually a submissive man? Are the interviews with couples in her book slices of life or fictional parables? Elise Sutton has built a business around her femdom persona, published several books on female domination and has her own website offering advice to those interested in the lifestyle. If the author isn’t who she says she is does that invalidate her ideas?

I don’t know if Elise Sutton is “real” or not but I enjoyed reading her books. Her first book “Female Domination” broadened my horizons and introduced me to new ideas about femdom relationships. It was Ms. Sutton who first introduced me to the phrase “seducing a woman into dominance”. She challenged me to think about the difference between true submission and chasing my own desires.

When I first read “Female Domination” I knew I wanted something more than occasional fantasy play in the bedroom but I wasn’t sure how to approach it. Ms. Sutton pushed me in the direction of establishing a femdom relationship at home with loving service as the centerpiece. Other books filled in more detail for me and were perhaps more on target about the realities of femdom relationships but all things considered I found Ms. Sutton’s work a good place to start my exploration.

Ms. Sutton is correct that a submissive man should think carefully before presenting female domination to his beloved. He should think about what might appeal to her rather than assuming she will share his sexual fantasies. He should not (for example) attempt to win her over by showing her femdom pornography. Most femdom porn is designed to appeal to the male libido and has been known to have precisely the opposite effect on women. First impressions are extremely important. If his initial presentation fails he may turn his lady love off to the whole idea.

Ms. Sutton gets into trouble when she makes sweeping generalizations about people. Of course all women aren’t dominant any more than all men are submissive. Her attempts to explain male submission through the prism of sociological theory sound pretty far fetched to me. So do her assertions that our society is heading toward becoming a matriarchy. I have heard submissive men fantasize dreamily about female supremacist utopias but I don't think I have ever heard a woman do so.  Ms. Sutton’s books do seem to fire the imaginations of submissive men suggesting we are the intended audience. Does that mean “she” is actually one of us? An interesting question to which I don’t have an answer.

The meat of Ms. Sutton’s sociological and psychological theories are covered in the first five chapters of “Female Domination”. After that we get to the fun stuff with chapters on corporal punishment, strap-on play, chastity, fetishism, humiliation and cuckolding. In those chapters Ms. Sutton interviews “real couples” about their experiences in the femdom lifestyle. These chapters are lighter in nature and often fun to read. I remember being turned on by some of them in much the same way I am turned on reading some of the femdom lifestyle blogs.

All in all I found “Female Domination” to be a fun, informative and sexy read even if some of the author’s theories were a little far fetched. All things considered the positives outweighed the negatives even if the book was something of a mixed bag. The beautiful cover art by the mighty Sardax also make this book a pleasure to own.

Art by Sardax