Sunday, July 20, 2014

Freshly Whipped Plaything

Her Majesty and I had a wonderful time up North. Unfortunately she had to leave for her annual migration South almost as soon as we arrived home. This morning I awoke at 3am fetched her coffee and carried her bags downstairs. A few minutes later a taxi pulled up in front of our house and whisked her away.

I had given up on having a session before she left. Much to my surprise she welcomed me home with a big smile on Friday night and told me our son (who is back from college) would be out for the evening. I took in that information blinking stupidly like a deer in the head lights. Having already accepted that my fondest wish would probably be denied it took me a minute to readjust.

“We can play after dinner” she said smiling sweetly. 

“Yes!” I thought. “She did mean that!”

It was a warm summer night so Her Majesty didn’t bother with Dominatrix attire. She sat on the couch watching a loud action packed movie while I sat beneath her on the floor rubbing her feet. After awhile I lay back and spread my legs wide apart so she could crush my balls underfoot. Finally she told me to hand her the whip. Her Majesty’s whip is short, thick and cruel. I knelt on the floor kissing her foot while she painted my ass bright red with it. 

Her Majesty took her time, slowly building the intensity. She whipped me patiently and methodically like a master chef preparing egg whites for a delicious souffle. Periodically I felt her cool fingers run over my burning ass cheeks as though checking to make sure her dish was well cooked. In the beginning it was hard for me to stay still. Our short single tail carries plenty of sting and thud. By the end I welcomed every stroke of her lash like a fiery kiss. I wanted it go on forever. I was flying. Eventually I heard her say; “OK that’s enough”, from somewhere far above me. 

I knelt in patient anticipation while Her Majesty donned a pair of latex gloves. She slipped her fingers inside me; lubricating me and stretching me out. I felt the tip of the vibrating dildo press against my asshole. I pushed against it and helped guide her hand; surrendering to her completely and willing myself to open up like a flower. The head slipped all the way in making me cry out. The long thick shaft followed, filling me up and making me groan. She slid it all the way in and left it there. I felt a single latex gloved finger slide from my perineum up to my balls. She took them in her rubber gloved fingers and squeezed. 

“Thank you Ma’am!” I sobbed in ecstasy. 

She slid the dildo out and all the way back in; fuciking me slowly and exquisitely. She turned the dial on the vibrator all the way up. Nothing existed but the steady hum of the dildo deep in my ass and Her Majesty’s fingers milking my balls. On television the villain’s hideout exploded; bursting into flames and falling over a cliff just as I erupted in a white hot super nova.

I am going to miss Her Majesty a lot.  The memory of our beautiful session will nurture and sustain me while I count the days awaiting her return. Today is our 28th Wedding Anniversary.

Photos courtesy of:

Saturday, July 5, 2014

Where Two Waters Meet

Her Majesty and I will be dropping off the radar for a little while. In a few days we are traveling to the island where I spent many childhood summers and where my Mother lived for over twenty years. I will not be bringing a computer. Even if I did Internet access would be problematic at best. We will be performing the final rights for Mom; casting her ashes adrift where the two waters meet. For me this will be a time of quiet introspection, rediscovering simple pleasures and saying my final goodbyes. It will be time for quieting my mind; shutting out the seemingly endless chatter that distracts me from experiencing life in the moment and spending quality time with my family. The island we are visiting holds a special kind of magic for me. I haven’t been back in five years and I am really looking forward to seeing it again. Our son feels much the same way and he will be joining us on the trip. I hope everyone who reads the blog is having a peaceful, safe and joyous 4th of July holiday. As Aarkey would say; "Namaste".

Photo courtesy of Google Images

Wednesday, July 2, 2014

Dinner With D.L. King

Her Majesty and I recently enjoyed a lovely dinner with D.L. King; author and editor extraordinaire at her private residence in Brooklyn New York. Diane slow grilled a rack of baby back ribs while we sat beneath a pear tree in her backyard engaged in lively conversation. We met her adorable pussy cat Bat Girl who apparently can fly. I tried unsuccessfully to connect Diane’s Macbook Air to her television so I could share some recent scuba diving videos with her. In fact I got so involved in that project we almost missed our bus home. Thank goodness Her Majesty looked at her watch when she did. We spent a very suspenseful cab ride stuck in traffic on the Brooklyn Queens Expressway certain we would never make the bus in time. Fortunately our cab pulled up to the curb just as the bus was boarding.

Her Majesty doesn’t meet many people in the scene. I could not have found a more welcoming scene representative for her than D. L. King. To my delight Her Majesty and Diane clicked immediately and got along extremely well. They share many things in common beyond just an interest in BDSM. I couldn’t help thinking how far from the cliche notion of a dominatrix they both are. Both are genuinely caring people, warm and down to earth. Happily this is what “real” dominant women can actually be like.

At one point Diane turned to Her Majesty and asked; “beating someone is fun right?” Naturally my Queen answered in the affirmative. I asked Diane what she thought of the notion that D/s relationships should be 24/7 in order to be authentic. “I don’t know why people can’t just relax and have a good time!” she replied with a characteristic grin that lit up her face.

Diane is a highly respected author and editor. I have long admired her work so I asked her for some advice on writing erotica. Diane advised me to write less like a blogger and concentrate on creating characters and situations that have a life of their own. Regardless of which details in a story are true, she advised, a character’s motivations should make sense in the context of the story. Reality can be used sparingly for inspiration and authenticity but Diane advised me to stay away from writing stories that are literally autobiographical. Needless to say I listened to her advice intently.

Not surprisingly Diane’s house is overflowing with books. An entire wall is decorated with framed covers of published works she has either written or edited. Writing erotica is a tough business. More like a labor of love really. Before we left Diane gave us an autographed copy of her new book “Slave Girls”. The inscription on the title page reads; “Just reverse the roles. Love D.L. King.”
D. L. King

Saturday, June 21, 2014

A Dominatrix Who Hates Heels

When I saw the New York Times article; "A Dominatrix Who Hates Heels" I thought it might have been written about Her Majesty. Her Majesty doesn’t exactly hate heels but she finds them uncomfortable. As it turns out the article was about Emmanuelle Seigner, wife of director Roman Polanski. Mr. Polanski has directed a film version of “Venus In Furs” in which Ms. Seigner plays the role of Wanda.


Venus in Furs” was a novella written in 1870 by Austrian writer Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. It was Leopold who put the “masoch” in masochism. Severin the protagonist of the story puts Wanda on a pedestal and pledges his undying devotion, asking for nothing in return but humiliation and suffering. His masochistic longings are expounded on in vivid purple prose making it apparent that Severin is a thinly veiled stand in for the author who obviously shares his pervy predilections.

I recommend reading the novella if you haven’t already done so. The language is a bit stilted but then it was 1870. Many have observed that Severin is far from the perfect submissive. He tops from the bottom and has a tendency to be whiny and annoying. To my mind that only serves to make him more authentic! (LOL!) I recently reviewed a stunning new edition of  “Venus In Furs” illustrated and translated by Sardax.

The Polanski film “Venus In Fur” is based on the Tony Award winning play of the same name written by David Ives.. The central character is a writer and director named Thomas played by Mathieu Amalric whose reportedly riveting performance is  “very close to a Polanski impersonation”. Emmanuelle Seigner plays a sultry actress named Vanda who arrives late to audition for the role of Wanda in a theatrical version of “Venus In Furs”. As they rehearse the play the chemistry between director and actress ignites and they are transformed into a modern day incarnation of Severin and Wanda.

Mathieu Amalric, Emmanuelle Seigner and Roman Polanski in "Venus In Fur"

In his review of the film titled “"A Sadist and a Masochist Walk Into A Theater" New York Times critic A.O. Scott asks: “Is it about sex or power? Art or life? The nature of theater or the logic of desire? Why choose? And why exclude the possibility that the movie is also about Mr. Polanski himself?”

Her Majesty and I greatly enjoyed seeing the play “Venus In Fur” last spring. Needless to say we are also looking forward to seeing Mr. Polanski’s film. Shout out to Paltego keeper of the flame at Femdom Resource for posting about the upcoming film and the Sardax edition of the book.

When asked what she found most challenging about playing the role of Wanda Emmanuelle Seigner replied; “the most difficult thing about the role was to wear those high heels.” My suggestion to the dominatrix who hates heels but has a slave who loves them is to train him in the devotional art of bare foot worship. It worked for Her Majesty and I. Bright red toe nail polish is always a nice touch.

Images courtesy of:

Saturday, June 14, 2014

The Fundamental Things Apply

Esther Perel recently appeared on the Colbert Report to discuss her new book; “Mating In Captivity; Unlocking Erotic Intelligence”. During the interview Ms. Perel shared that she was baffled by infidelity because many people that stray appear to be in happy relationships. Nevertheless they frequently succumb to temptation often with disastrous results. If they are so happy what are they seeking and why would they risk it all?

Ms. Perel maintains that people who cheat seek attention, romance and excitement. They long to re-experience the dopamine rush they remember feeling when they first fell in love. People sometimes feel taken for granted in long term relationships. They want to view themselves as being desirable in someone else’s eyes. Men can be especially obtuse about their own motivations and tend to view everything through the prism of sex. In his interview with Ms. Perel Stephen Colbert brought the topic of conversation back to sex at every opportunity with hilarious results.

I have come to believe that kinky and vanilla relationships are similar in many respects. D/s relationships are essentially romantic relationships; albeit with a different set of power dynamics. Naturally people want their relationship to feel as vibrant after 20 years as it did when they first fell in love. Unfortunately no relationship remains the same. Over time even the most vibrant relationships lose some of their shine, changing shape to more comfortably fit the contour of the human beings they encompass. Comfort and familiarity are lovely but they can be detrimental to passion and desire.

I have not read Ms. Perel’s book so I do not know what advice she gives vanilla couples for keeping things fresh and exciting over the long haul. I can only report a few mental tricks I use to put myself in the correct frame of mind for a romantic reboot. For me state of mind is all important. As a sub attitude is everything. I am chasing a feeling. Looking for the happy place.

By concentrating on serving and obeying Her Majesty rather than focusing on my own desires I can bring myself back into spiritual alignment with her and refresh the romance in our D/s relationship. When she recognizes that quality of open vulnerable obedience in me she is more likely to respond with affectionate dominant control. I sometimes refer to that as seducing her into dominance but really it’s more like connecting a circuit where power flows symbiotically both ways. Once that circuit is established Her Majesty and I are in the happy place. Of course nobody gets to stay in the happy place forever. It’s a bit like meditation where the mind keeps chattering and distracting you. Nevertheless practicing devotion and obedience can become like exercising a muscle that becomes stronger over time.

Lately I have been concentrating on the fundamentals. In the right frame of mind the simple act of kissing Her Majesty’s foot can be a profound and deeply sexy experience. There is nothing wrong with requesting play either. The difference between a humble request and a demand should be self evident . Here too I practice obedience because if the answer is no I must gracefully take that in stride and not complain. It is difficult to be patient sometimes but the waiting only serves to make Her Majesty’s dominance all the sweeter when it rises like the sun to warm my soul.

Whether you are in a vanilla or a kinky relationship keeping the home fires burning is extremely important. Regardless of who is on top it takes two to tango. The fundamental things apply as time goes by.

Photos courtesy of:
The English Mansion
Femme Fatale Films

Special thanks to:
For The Man Who Knows His Place
Classy Femdom Universe

Wednesday, June 4, 2014


It’s been a rough couple of months as Her Majesty and I have coped with the whirlwind surrounding my mother’s passing. While it was happening I felt disconnected from my emotions like I was having an out of body experience. Now that the crisis is over I have more time to reflect on my feelings. I get sad sometimes but that is to be expected. I am already remembering Mom as the independent, dynamic person I knew and loved through most of her life instead of the frail confused person she was at the end.

I started losing Mom to dementia a few years ago. She was in an assisted living facility close to us. I had to manage and coordinate her care which was a lot to handle as an only child but I feel good about having done it. In the process I got to know a very different side of Mom and any outstanding issues we had were resolved. Her Majesty and I have been thinking about her passing a lot and have been reminded of our own mortality frequently during the process. I could not have made it through this experience without Her Majesty’s help that's for sure.

I have not blogged about my feelings much except to post a eulogy for Mom, having discovered that not everything in life makes suitable blog fodder. Instead I have been writing in my journal while the blog has served as a welcome escape from reality into sexy femdom fantasy. Very little is as challenging as caring for a loved one at the end of life. That said there are lessons and rewards for the caregiver that I am grateful to have received.

Going through this experience has changed my perspective. Things that used to seem critical to me don’t seem quite so important anymore. I now place greater value on things I once took for granted. I am slowing down, taking time to smell the roses and not sweating the small stuff quite so much. It is finally dawning on me that the stress of being always on call, the constant juggling of priorities and the frantic planning for an uncertain future have finally come to an end. I can see light at the end of the tunnel and it isn’t an oncoming train. 

Needless to say many things including D/s play got put on the back burner while Her Majesty and I dealt with the challenges facing us. I am happy to say we enjoyed a lovely session last weekend. Rather than blogging about it now I will simply say it was a blissful and much needed reaffirmation of our devotion to each other. Let the healing continue.

Sunrise 06/10
Vulcan Sunrise by American Psycho
Sunrise at Cualo
Courtesy of Google Images

Saturday, May 31, 2014

Whistle Of The Cane 3

He kneels before her as she cuts him with the cane again and again. Accelerating the speed and force of his caning she offers him her stiletto heel to suck. He eagerly takes it into his mouth. Finally she pulls her booted foot away and rises to her feet; stepping back to give herself more room to swing. She picks up one the reformatory canes and starts laying on the strokes with relish; slowly increasing the intensity until she makes him cry out. He does his best to hold position; emitting tortured animal noises as the cane bites into his upper thighs. She presses his face into the carpet with her booted foot. “I will remember this whipping for a long time!” The thought flits through his consciousness as she lays down a final blistering volley making him gasp.

“Thank you Ma’am!”, he cries. “Thank you so much!”

Finally the blows cease raining down from above and his punishment is over. He looks up at her with a dazed and confused expression. Deep in subspace he is only connected to reality by a tenuous thread. He tries to think but doesn’t quite remember how. He wants her to do all the thinking for him from now on. He gazes longingly at her sitting above him, beautiful and imperious. She beckons to him. Slowly he rises to his knees and drapes his body over her leg resting his head on her thigh.

“Ha ha! Oh I see!” she laughs extending her booted foot for him. “Be careful now don’t hurt yourself!”

The feeling of soft supple leather sliding against his cock is irresistible. The laces of her boots are rough and the gold eyelets cut into his flesh. Everything together is sensory overload. He whimpers and buries his face in her jeans hungrily inhaling her familiar smell. Hovering helplessly on the edge he absorbs everything happening in the moment. His cock slides up and down against her soft leather boot. Rough laces and metal eyelets tear at his flesh. His momentum gathers speed like a snowball hurtling downhill.

“Are you humping my leg like a little dog?”, she whispers, goading him on. He sails over the cliff as his orgasm erupts all over the laces of her beautiful black leather boots.

“Good boy!” she laughs tousling his hair. He lays with his head in her lap as he drifts slowly down to earth.

“OK that’s enough. Go fetch a paper towel and clean up your mess”, she softly commands. He does as instructed rising unsteadily to his feet. Picking up the junior cane she cuts the air with it.

“I love my new toy!” she exclaims with a delighted laugh.

“Whistle Of The Cane” was a short story treatment of a session between Her Majesty and I during which I presented her with some new Dragon Canes. I wrote it awhile ago and recently decided to post it. While doing so my Windows PC crashed and I had to rebuild it from scratch. I have since switched to a MacBook Pro (sweet!) and have sworn off Windows computers for home use. During the crash I lost a year’s worth of photos downloaded from the web. Luckily with so many fabulous femdom tumblr sites out there I don’t really need to store a library of photos on my hard drive anymore. Thanks to “Lashkisser”, “Bei Fuss” and many other femdom Tumblr sites for helping me decorate this post!

Photos courtesy of:
Divine Bitches
Sado Ladies
NuWest-Leda (This one brings back fond memories...)
Captured By The Huntress
Club Dom